I started having sex at a time when men felt entitled to ask me to “send pictures” out of the blue. And when my answer was always a resounding “yes,” these people left a pretty bad taste in my mouth about sexting in general. But now—I’ve had many years of those events—I’ve changed my tune. And the thought of sending erotic pictures and texts to my significant other sounds like the beginning of a good time. I am not alone in this opinion. According to experts in the field of sex and relationships, sexting is one of the best ways to make a relationship fun, prolong the period of intimacy, improve sexual quality, and increase self-confidence.
That being said, sexting can be scary, regardless of whether you’ve never sexted before or you’ve mastered the art of sexting. So, in my quest to promote healthy conversations about sex and sexual wellness, I set out to find the best tips to feel more comfortable sexting with your partner. Keep scrolling to learn how to start sexting, the benefits of sexting, and what to say when taking pictures.
How to start having sex
1. Discover your partner’s interests
Before you start sending sexy messages to your partner, it’s a good idea to check their level of interest in sexting. You can go the right way and ask them directly how they feel about sexting and if it is something they would be open to. Or, you can put some emotions in there and subtly engage the subject in conversation and see how they react. If you both like him, discuss and set some ground rules that will make both of you comfortable and make sex more enjoyable. As with all things sex, trust and comfort are key.
2. Think about what they like
Is there anything more heartwarming and empowering than knowing you can make your partner feel good? I do not think so. Before you start your first sext, think about what they like and what turns them on, and how you can play on these things and meet their needs. When it’s time to send a sext, you’ll know exactly what to say to get their attention.
3. Choose the right time
Time management is also key. While it may be hot to think about flirting with your partner while they’re on their way to a work meeting, they may not want a sexy distraction if they’re really trying to focus. . It is a good idea to ask your partner what they are doing or if they are busy before starting a sexting session.
4. Start slowly
It is important to start slowly, increase sexual tension, build anticipation, and become comfortable in sexting conversations using sexually suggestive text messages. Anything that lets your partner know that you’re in the mood and ready to play will work here (think: “hey, you” or “want to know what I’m thinking right now?” ). Similarly, sexologist Emily Morse tells The Cut and personal experience are some of the best sex conversation starters. From there, emphasize and rely on profanity as the sexting session progresses.
5. Send a funny picture
Sometimes, it’s good to leave things to the imagination. Take pictures of certain body parts to stimulate your partner, such as your lips, neck, bust, thighs, derrière, or any other sexually stimulating area-how to access is entirely up to you. If you want to post nudes, that’s your prerogative! Just make sure your partner is in a place where they can get naked and you trust them with pictures of your body.
6. Tap into your imagination
Balancing your fantasy and deepest desires in real life is easier said than done. Sexting, however, can take some of the shame out of it, so now is the time to start telling your partner about any sexual encounters, moves, or pranks you have. and exciting. Let your partner know what’s on your mind, and ask them how your fantasy makes them feel and what their fantasy is.
7. Stay in your comfort zone
Sexting should be fun and exciting for you and your partner. If you don’t feel comfortable doing something, don’t force yourself to do it! Just use the language and send pictures that you feel comfortable with, and let yourself be creative and have fun. When it comes down to it, there’s no wrong way to sext.
Benefits of Sexting
1. It smells good in relationships
One of the best benefits of sexting is that it can improve your relationship. It’s easy to fall into a routine when you’re in a long-term relationship, but sending sexy pictures and texts to each other will take you back to the early days of your relationship when your libido was running high and you weren’t. the power to keep you. mark each other. You’ll strengthen your bond, tap into your sexuality, and turn it on—really, it’s a win-win.
2. It boosts self-confidence
In addition to being a partner in his beliefs, sexting can also boost self-confidence. Taking the time to take pictures of your body from different angles can help you love and appreciate it more. And when you get in touch with your body, your libido will increase.
3. It can help you communicate your sexual needs.
Like a sex board game, sexting can open up a conversation about what’s important to you in the bedroom. “Sexting can give you a way to tell your partner what you want,” says relationship expert, therapist, and JD Rachel DeAlto. Good+good. “Sometimes it can be uncomfortable to ask what you want in bed, face to face. Sexting can leave those subtle hints.”
4. It promotes sexual health
If you’re wondering how to have sex, look no further. Sexting is one of the best things about solo play—something somatic sexologist Kiana Reeves swears is crucial to sexual health. “Sexual pleasure is very good and good for you,” he told me recently. Don’t be afraid to start a sexting session or turn to the old times you like for personal pleasure.
What To Say When Sexting Happens
- “I have the best dream about you. Want to hear it?”
- “I can’t stop thinking about how you kissed me the other night.”
- “Tell me what you want me to do for you.”
- “Do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?”
- “You want to see what I’m wearing now?”
- “I’m lying in bed thinking about you ____ and / and me.”
- “It turns me on so much when you ____”
- “It’s me, hi! I’m happy, baby.”
- “Come now let me rip your clothes off.”
- “Can you leave work early?” I’m waiting for you naked in bed.”
- “I love it when you touch me ____ and ____.”
- “Dessert is first on the menu tonight.”
- “I have an illusion where we…”
- “I want you so bad.”
- “I want you to think I’m going to ____ you when you touch yourself.”
- “I want to have my way with you ASAP.”
- “I’m yours for the taking.”
- “In my mind, right now, I’m ____.”
- “What am I doing in your fantasy?”
- “I can’t wait to be with you ____ later.”
- “Makes me laugh until I’m screaming and shaking and can’t take it anymore.”
- “You will meet a different side of me tonight.”
- “Tell me what to do.”
- “I found a new toy for us to play with.”
- “I bought this new lube. Want to find out if it tastes as good as it does?”
- “Wish you were Here.”
- “Let’s try to move the body we did the other night.”
- “I can’t stop thinking about how your breath hits my neck when you whisper in my ear.”
- “Let me show you how much I love you.”
- “I feel like I’m doing something wrong with you.”
